Foiled Again (Part 1 of Loop)

If I can't even do five days, how the hell am I supposed to pull off 50? It's hard not to keep asking myself that, especially after falling short two times in a row. But then again, maybe two unsuccessful four day trips adds up to one full five day trip. You think? It's going to have to, because I'm just not going to be able to fit in another big trip this year. Besides, I know the lessons I learned on my two failed attempts far outweigh what I would have gotten out of a more agreeable and victorious 5 day trip. That's what I'm going to keep telling myself, anyway. Thus, here is yet another story of a 5 day turned 4 day backpack.

An awesome family

Our friend, Rick, has been wanting to do Spider Meadow/Gap as a multi-family hike for a couple years now. Having done it before, he knew it was an amazing hike to do with kids. Now that Summer had one backpack trip under her belt, it was the perfect year to do it; plus I saw on the Washington Trails Association page (a GREAT place to get all the info you need for hiking) that August 3rd was proclaimed "Washington Trails Day"--how apropos!

Isaac will often come up to you and ask
for a hug. I love that kid.

I felt so honored to be doing this hike with the youngest of our crew, Isaac--who although no stranger to hiking had never been on a backpacking trip. And so, even with a forecast of thunder storms, we set off for our group adventure.

Starting in...Ken and Rick would catch up later

Because I was still hungering to check off "5 Days" from my to do list, I of course saw this as the perfect opportunity. The plan was to camp together at Spider Meadow the first night, then head up to the gap on day 2 and part ways at the top. I would continue on the loop, (called the "Spider Gap-Buck Creek Pass Loop", for anyone who is interested) while everyone else headed back and spent the 2nd night at the original camp. This plan was advantageous for me in a couple ways: not only could I get help with my 35 pound backpack for the most difficult push of the trip, but because we had to take two cars, I could have my hubby move our car to where I would be ending my trip--saving me almost 3 miles of ugly road walking. (I would later find out that this truly saved my life. Ok, not literally...but almost!)

Natures backpack rack

I was very thankful that even though it was pouring rain as we were packing up the car, nobody was complaining. I would be lying if I said I wasn't struggling with the thought of another wet experience, so I really needed everyone else's positive attitude. What a surprise and delight to find a little sun once we arrived! Sure it was cloudy, but the bad forecast turned out to be a blessing in disguise, because we practically had the whole place to ourselves. (On a Friday! Ken let me know that Saturday was a madhouse though, which is to be expected on any nice weekend)

Heidi and Jason--too cute

 There was only one family camping next to us--an adorable couple, taking their three small girls on their first backpack as well. Ken let me know they ran into them at the top after I left--with a five year old in tow! Very impressive. (they did have to carry her much of the way, so think twice about taking anyone that young)

Kids being kids

Our kids may have been older than 5, but I was still very impressed with their accomplishment. Getting to the gap is not easy! But so worth it...as we stood on what felt to be the top of the world, Summer declared there was nowhere else she would rather be. Talk about melt my heart--Happy Washington Trails Day to us!

The hills are alive...

I'm...too sexy for my pack...
(I shouldn't tease, he's carrying half my stuff. Thank you, honey!)

Finally at the top, (what a haul!) and it was time to say goodbye. Everyone gathered around me and said a little prayer for my well being...it was beautiful and definitely put a lump in my throat.

As I set off, I thought I was supposed to go straight down the glacier. There appeared to be steps in the snow going down the middle, but it also looked like maybe it was just the line of snow debris. Going off to the right there was a more obvious trail, but it had a sketchy snow field to cross. The boys thought the obvious trail to the right to be my best bet, and being concerned for my safety, Rick put on my backpack, and they both crossed over to make "steps" and make sure I made it ok. (Though Rick assured me even if we did slip, we would have just slid to the bottom...no rocks to run into) 

My hero's

We kept following the trail a little further, but it stopped at an even steeper, sketchier snow field. (rocks at the bottom of this one)  Hummm...as we doubled back, it seemed the trail just sort of meandered it's way down with no more snow to worry about; so we finally said our real goodbyes, with a couple more pictures of course.

Officially on my own

It was only minutes after they left that I knew I was in trouble. The "trail" did not meander anywhere...it was just mud shoots going down to a pretty steep cliff. I was immediately queasy in my stomach, and huffing back up the very steep non-trail my backpack suddenly seemed to weigh 1000 pounds. What had a gotten myself into? Do I hurry to try to catch up to the boys to tell them I changed my mind? How humiliating! No, I would go back to the 2nd snow field where the obvious trail seemed to end, cross it, and then I was sure the trail would become more apparent.

Nate getting my load to the top. Melissa helped too--
don't know what I would have done without them

I knew in my heart I was being stupid, but I was letting my determination get the best of me. The second I stepped onto the snow I was regretting it; I had no business being there with my lack of experience and proper equipment (like an ice ax to stop stop me if I slipped)...but there was no turning back at that point. I was shaking like a leaf when my foot finally hit solid ground--thank God I could just get on with it and leave that poor decision behind. Except I still couldn't find any trail. (believe me I tried!) Just the same cliff, with no way down. Now I was REALLY queasy. Determination can be a wonderful thing, but when it's mixed with pride, it can be deadly. I realized with great remorse that I may just have been horribly, pridefully, stupidly determined. Nevertheless, I had to turn around and cross again that snow field that I shouldn't have crossed in the first place.

Humiliation didn't matter at all at this point. I didn't care if I showed up back at camp in utter defeat--the thought of being with everyone filled my heart with joy. All that mattered was not being crushed on the rocks below. Maybe I'm being overly dramatic; maybe it wouldn't have been a big deal if I had slipped. I'll never know, thank God, because obviously I made it across. But I don't think I've ever been so scared, honestly. We often say an operation is "do or die", but I think one really needs to think about what accomplishments are worth dying over. This was certainly not one.

Hiking lesson (and life lesson) #33 : Determination can work for you, or against you; depending on whether or not ego is your driving force. Pray for the wisdom to know when it is, and humbly admit when you are in over your head.

It seems this story should end with me sitting around camp with everyone, gladly joking about what an idiot I am...but it doesn't. I'm sure we will all get together soon, and I'll be more than happy to get razzed about my idiocy; but this story does not end here. I still have more mistakes to make...stay tuned.

Mr. Marmot wants to know what happens next!

P.S. Photo cred to Rich for most the pics on this blog. (the really good ones :)) Thank you Rich!
P.S.S. Here you go, Mr. Marmot. :) http://kellbell-whywouldanyonereadthis.blogspot.com/2013/08/spider-gap-buck-creek-pass-loop-part-2.html

Summer's First Backpacking Trip

The first backpacking trip for my daughter, not of the season--just to clarify. ;) I named her years before she was even conceived when I saw someone's name tag at a grocery store (I had never even heard the name Summer before) and thought, "if we ever have another kid, I want it to be a girl, and that will be her name." I hesitated though, when I actually got pregnant again. Our last name sounds like a vegetable, and Summer + vegetable last name= kids teasing. But I finally decided I just had to name her Summer; because it felt like destiny. 

Thankfully they didn't catch a fish with their homemade pole,
because we promised to eat it if they did!

I think I was so captivated by that name because who doesn't love summer? It's bright, happy, and fun; all the things I wanted my little girl to be. And she has lived up to her name, in spades. She is a true nature's child, which I love; except that she hates to wear shoes and takes them off whenever she gets the chance. (Losing them everywhere...I need to buy flip flops by the dozen.) 

Are you going to get in, or what?

This is how it's done, girls!

And my little Summer is no stranger to camping; we started taking her when she was just 10 months old. The thing is, although she loves to be outdoors, she would rather be doing something EXCITING (like wake-boarding with her Dad) and hiking did not fit the bill.

We love froggies, too

But recently she has been finally warming up to hiking, (even after our last hike when I ended up screaming at her http://kellbell-whywouldanyonereadthis.blogspot.com/2013/06/boulder-river-rampage.html) and actually asked me if she could go on a backpacking trip with me. Hooray!--but where to go?

Someone got a hold of my camera

I wanted it to be amazing, of course, so she would fall in love and want to come all the time...but it couldn't be too hard, especially because she was bringing her friend who described herself as "not very active". Kids need a lake to swim in, and a fire pit to make smores. I finally decided that Barclay Lake was the perfect fit. 

loving our own little beach

Smores anyone? They are just a little crispy

Now that it is all said and done, I can say I don't think there could be a more perfect fit for a beginner than this hike; with one condition...go on a weekday. (which we did, and had the whole place to ourselves--like always) The girls plopped themselves down at the first campsite we came to and declared it the best. (after just 2 miles of hiking; you don't get easier than that) I usually have to scope all of the sites out before choosing, but this was their gig, so I didn't argue. (and wouldn't you know, they were right) 

The girls decided to put their tent in a secluded spot
over to the side. So grown up.

Trying to make pancakes on my mini stove
...it sort of worked

I was a little bummed the weather never cleared that first day, as promised by the forecasters. But the next morning as the sun started breaking through, and the hordes started showing up, I realized just how lucky we were. And this was a Thursday morning...so I'm sure the weekends are complete madness.

The calm of foggy...

the chaos of sunny

When we were almost packed up, a huge group of teens showed up and asked if they could have our site. Debbie informed me later that it was a nature camp for kids who wouldn't normally be able to do that kind of stuff, and all the gear had been donated. Debbie had all this information because of course she had completely packed up hours earlier and was therefore able to gab; while I, on the other hand, was still frantically shoving everything in whatever pack it would fit into. Do you think she will ever rub off on me? (Unlikely)

Can you guess which pack is Debbie's?

A good friend wants to come even when
your bringing tweens. So, I love her even
with her OCD. ;)

Finally, just as we were leaving, Summer got to see just how exciting hiking could be when a base jumper landed on our beach. (turns out Mount Baring is one of the most popular places to do this--who knew?) 

A surprise guest

Unfortunately, we didn't get to see him land, but after packing up his gear he did plant himself by our fire pit and chat with us for a little while. This might have also been unfortunate, because after talking to him, Summer decided that clamoring up a mountain and then jumping off the top was just her kind of hiking! She may have the fearlessness of her father, but maybe she has his luck as well. One can only hope so. (to read about Ken's "luck", go to:
http://kellbell-whywouldanyonereadthis.blogspot.com/2013/07/the-legend-of-mount-erie.html)

Mount Baring--want to jump?
I know someone who would go with you.

I LOVE SUMMER...
the season, and especially the girl

The Legend of Mount Erie

Ken Beane. Yes...my husband is the legend of Mount Erie. (Well, in my opinion anyway!) I have good reason to think this though; he was bad ass in his day and established some of the hardest rock climbing routes there. His picture is even on the cover of the Mount Erie climbing guide (looking extremely hot, I might add) published in 2005 and currently out of print, though a new version is due to come out soon.

There is one climbing story in particular that is 'legendary' in nature, because it is simply quite unbelievable. It was so long ago--before we had kids, (another lifetime it seems) and after that much time you begin to wonder if your facts have been embellished. I dug out the old book and thumbed through it and found a little blurb; it cited the same story. To further support this impossible tale are bolts that climbers drill into the rock to anchor their gear into for safety; and when they are drilled in, they there to stay--so you just can't fudge distances. And so, the fact is my husband fell 60 feet to the ground; and yes, it is still hard to believe.

For those of you who know nothing of rock climbing; I'm sorry, but I don't feel like doing much explaining about how it is done. I will say that when you are the first one to make it up a certain section of the rock, you get to name it. (thus "establishing" it) Here is the "blurb" from the guide book about how Ken's route got named Ground Zero:

Ken was about 60 feet up attempting to clip the 4th bolt when he fell. Fortunately, Ken was okay although badly shaken. His belayer had well-burnt hands and was very apologetic. 

Slightly undersold, wouldn't you say? Sixty fu*#ing feet!?! I hate to swear (ok, sometimes I like it) but hello...who falls 60 feet to the ground and is just "badly shaken"? And don't you love that the guy who dropped my husband to what should have been certain death was "very apologetic"? No shit. Ken just met him that day, and figured he could at least hold the rope; I mean, that part is not all that complicated. There is just one thing you have to be sure to do--have the rope in the right position when someone takes a fall. I'm guessing he wanted to impress Ken by being able to take in some of the slack, which would have lessened the fall had it worked. (Climbers always fall--just not to the ground, usually.) But it didn't work, and once you have the rope out of position when the full weight of the person falling is on it, there's nothing you can do. (hence the badly burned hands) We contribute the phenomenon that Ken was not broken to bits to the fact that he completely trusted his belayer to stop him; and therefore was totally relaxed when he hit the ground. Although it helps to explain it a little, I will still call it a miracle.

See that rock face in the distance?
Ken put the most difficult route going up that thing.

 

 Sometimes I get very contemplative about things, and of course this event is one of those things that really gets my wheels turning. I look at our beautiful kids, and our amazing 26 years together; and I realize these things could not have been--actually should not have been. Last weekend I needed to go back there and see the spot where my husband should have died, and give thanks that he didn't.

This is a lot easier said than done. Ken tried to show me in the guide book how to get to the infamous route, and when I got to the start of the trail (it begins on a real trail, but you quickly need to veer off) I found a posted hand drawn map of the climbing trails and took a picture to hopefully help me; but all to no avail.

Climbers are not hikers. Climbers don't give a crap about making a decent trail--they just want to get climbing. Therefore, climbing trails are not only crazy steep, (what's a switchback?) they are usually undefined --basically a brushy mess.

The map that didn't help me at all

I missed this trail the first time around--can you blame me?

Where the heck is the trail?

I won't bore you with how I went up and down and around looking for the right spot, but I will say I was EXHAUSTED by the time I got to where I thought "Ground Zero" was located. After showing Ken my pictures, he let me know I was just 70ish feet to the left of it. "But Ken, there was no trail going that direction"...oops, I forgot to consider it's a climbers trail; a tiny ledge barely carved into the side of the cliff that no sane person would walk on. No wonder I'm not a climber.

Can you see the climbers?

Before I end this, I need to give acclamation to Dallas Kloke, the author of the previously mentioned guide book and who many would acknowledge as the true legend of Mount Erie; which he was. He established routes on Mount Erie years before Ken was even born. And he climbed his whole life, until that fateful day when he dislodged a block of rock just 10 feet from the summit of "The Pleiades" and fell 300 feet to his death. Life and death, miracles and the absence of miracles, the beauty and the horror of this world with all it's mystery and wonder...I could never explain it. But I will always try my best to embrace it anyway, with thanks.

Desolation Decimation

(continued from Ross Lake East Bank Trail Part Two)
Desolation Peak is number 14 in my "100 Classic Hikes of Washington" book, so I was really excited to do it. It's claim to fame is the writer and poet, Jack Kerouac, who spent 63 days at the lookout on top in the summer of 1956. I've never read any of his stuff, but it seemed appropriate to bring one of his works along to read while I spent the night there. So I went to the library, and found a couple books that looked to weigh about 5 pounds each. So much for that idea.

Lightning Creek's dock is not so much fun in June

I did find another book in the same section that was the perfect size called "The Places That Scare You". Facing down fears is a lot of what backpacking is for me; so I grabbed it, knowing I could use all the help I could get.

Living on the edge

Therefore, as I sat in my tent that Thursday morning listening to the rain and deciding what to do, I tried to be really honest with myself and my fears. I wanted to prove I could do this, I knew that. I didn't want to come back not having accomplished what I set out to do either. Having people think I wimped out was what I really feared, and avoiding that would have been what drove me up that mountain--and I didn't like that. Bragging rights were the ONLY motivation for me, because I knew hauling that heavy bag up there to look at nothing else but clouds would have just crushed my spirit. It was hard, but I finally gave myself permission to not do it.

Good times in my tent...will these socks ever dry?

I would just stick it out where I was for another night, and then meet my friends at Devil's Junction the next night as planned. But laying there, doing absolutely nothing but thinking (and knowing I had HOURS to do it)...well, it was awful. I started imagining really terrible things; like falling off that bridge on my way back and breaking both my legs. I knew it was ridiculous to be thinking that way--but I was in a dark place.

A spooky part of the trail. I walked extra fast here.

The book I brought along talked a lot about how much we long for comfort and security, but ironically our clinging on to those things often becomes our prison. This certainly rang true for me, as I lay there in my comfy sleeping bag not wanting to get wet, and yet feeling miserable at the same time. I needed to get out of there! The biggest problem was wondering if I could get out in time to stop my friends from coming in. I had waited so long to decide to wave the white flag, that I didn't have time to make it out before dark. (plus, 17ish miles in one day would have really killed me) I finally figured I could make it to Rainbow Point easily enough that night; and even though I didn't have a permit, I doubted it would be a problem on a crappy weekday. The next day I could high tail it out of there first thing in the morning and be able to get to Newhalem around noon. (where I knew there was phone reception)

Once I had this plan, I was like a machine. I packed up in record time and got to Rainbow Point lickity split. I credit this in part to the "You Go Girl" in my pocket. Can I just say this piece of "equipment" has changed my life. For anyone who doesn't know, it's a rubber "thing" that you use to pee. (for a girl, obviously...boys have their own thing) Hence, much time is saved because I no longer need to stop to pee. Of course, I stopped in the sense that I stopped walking...but no taking my pack off, no tromping off trail to find a hidden spot, no squatting down and wondering if a tick is going to find a nice little home...(YUCK! Ticks are my new phobia. I was devastated to recently find out we have them in Washington) I just face away from the trail and take a whiz like a man. Boys DO NOT UNDERSTAND how good they have it! But no more will I have to worry about getting caught with my pants down...and if you want to know why I'm so paranoid about that, read my "For Barefoot Jake" post.

My "special" pocket

I did take one little side trip before Rainbow Point. I needed to see what we would be missing at Devil's Junction, so I dropped my pack and ran down there. (glad I took the pack off--it's almost a half mile to get to the single camp site on the water) I saw from a distance that it was occupied, and I figured it would be nice of me to go tell them they could have it another night if they wanted. They were really thankful they didn't have to move to another camp, as they had everything all set up with their tarps and all. And I was thankful too, because there was a toilet with a door right there, and this time there was no avoiding squatting, if you know what I mean. So, that little excursion was a real win-win for everybody. 

Happily staying put

The view...maybe I can have my 46th party here

The next day was completely uneventful. Me and my little rubber friend cruised on out of there in plenty of time to stop the gang before they left. Debbie was so happy she didn't have to chance a night in the rain, that she promised me a party at her house--with cake and all. In the end, even though I didn't make it to Desolation Peak, I learned that in my being able to let go of my super duper birthday hike plan, I ultimately got everything I wanted. Maybe you can have your cake and eat it too. (stupidest saying ever...but it does sort of fit here, right?)

I did Roland Creek the right way the 2nd time.
I LOVE the Rei towel Rick gave me on my actual b-day.
I would have never got one myself,
but now I know I won't ever hike without it

All done, and now the sun comes out, of course.
But more importantly, how's my hair?

I even got special candles...I love you, Debbie!